This kind of beauty is not a princess or queen kind of beauty but a pleasure pig rolling in the mud kind of beauty. She’s made more mistakes than days lived and like a black widow she has spent her life making a Web that no one can break kind of beauty. She’s had her innocence broken into thousands of tiny mirror glass pieces. So now she offers them all up to provide reflections for the many. She knows being prey well. She’s been the hare, the deer, the roadkill. She’s wandered through the forest happily taking crumbs to keep her alive. She has dug down to that middle earth with a shovel made of sacrifices and compromises and desperations. She’s rumbled hard down there and reckoned in ways that people dust under the carpet of their hungry souls, terrified. She has that I’ve got nowhere to go but up kind of beauty. All of this has made her lighter, made space to NOT fill and liberation in her bones. She’s got I’ve earned every smear of dirt on my skin and under my nails and I’m humbled by it kind of beauty. She has stared hard into the void and she’s not afraid to love and hold anything you’ve got inside you kind of beauty. She has that I don’t need to prove, fight, run or hide kind of beauty. She’s got that soft petals of a fragrant rose that longs to be handled and also has thorns so don’t fuck with her kind of beauty. She’s got that I don’t need to be seen but lucky you for seeing her and she receives it with grace and gratitude kind of beauty. She has communed and danced deep and beautiful and slow with longing and laughter and now she can feel how love was before time. She’s got that gash so deep, now ornamented by wisdom, her heart is exposed to everything and she has made her own vulnerability as a gatekeeper kind of beauty. After the wildfire she has the burning embers in her womb that no one can put out kind of beauty. The beauty that rests and moves across her face after she’s surrendered into miles of forgiveness melting into the horizon. Her eyes welcome the darkness for they have become friends and lovers and teammates and there is something so Whole in her presence. Whatever arises, she loves that.